04.23.08

Seduction Skills Practice

Posted in Speed Seduction tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , at 3:10 pm by seduction teacher

Question from a Reader:

I ordered the books and read them but I feel like the exercises are hard to remember. Is there some technique to get rid of nervousness in less than 10 seconds?

Derek’s Reply

First things first: you sound too MTV about all this. “Is there some 2 second wish I can make to turn a beer gut into washboard abs without getting off the sofa?”

Yeah, right. These things take practice. That said, once you’re practiced, you CAN change your nervousness to confidence in 10 seconds – but you’ve got to build on PLENTY of practice to get there.

Likewise, the exercises aren’t meant to be memorized and recited for high marks. They’re meant to be practiced – daily if you can.

Get yourself a little corner of space where you work on them. Keep the book handy, and the teacher won’t check if you’re cheating; LOOK UP an exercise if you don’t remember it perfectly.

Then, practice it.

Repeat.

Soon enough, you won’t need the book anymore.

Keep repeating.

Soon enough, you won’t even need the exercises. Not the full ones, anyway.

Because the thing is, these exercises implant new ideas and reactions deep in your subconscious – the hard work is getting it there, but once you have, it doesn’t take much to reawaken the seeds you’ve planted.

So, let’s take your example of nervousness. Here’s an exercise you can do.

1. Go into a deep meditative state using the relaxation exercises from earlier in the book.
2. Allow the nervous feelings to emerge – if you can’t draw purely on the emotion, then remember a situation where you were nervous. Focus on that feeling. Where does it begin in your body? How does it feel?
3. Once you have focused the feeling, bring it to the crown of your head, and then let it descend as a ball of energy to rest in your left palm.
4. Now create a different feeling… one of total relaxation. If need be, think of a time in your past when you were totally relaxed and focus on that feeling. Where does it begin? How do you feel?
5. Once you have focused the feeling, bring it to the crown of your head, and then let it descend as a ball of energy to rest in your right palm.
6. Now bring your hands together and allow the balls to merge, with the relaxed feeling engulfing and swallowing the nervous one.
7. Bring yourself out of your meditative state.

As you can guess, that exercise takes more than 10 seconds. And it’ll take more than one or two runs to take hold.

However, once you’ve got it down, your nervous feelings will actually TRIGGER your feelings of relaxation, since you’ve linked them, with relaxation as the stronger victorious emotion.

In other words, it’ll take less than 10 seconds IN THE END. You might just clap your hands once to remind yourself of the balls mixing, and then boom, there ya go.

Question from a Reader

I’m a pretty shy guy. What advice do you have for ‘shy guys’ such as me when the urge comes to talk to that pretty girl next to him but he doesn’t have the balls?

Derek’s Response

The first time you drove, what did you drive?

Was it a hot sports car, revved to the gills, ready to race?

Or was it the broken-down jalopy that was supposed to be thrown away years ago, but it’d been saved for this moment?

Ok, you trust fund babies aside, we ALL start on something closer to a jalopy. You’re more likely to make a mistake, you’re more likely to GET NERVOUS ABOUT making a mistake, so you start out with something worth as little as possible.

Deal with women the same way.

If you get shy around the hotties of the world, then you shouldn’t start off with the hotties. Because, strange as it may seem, you act like a young kid behind the wheel of a Porsche, with A LOT to lose. Even though you don’t HAVE the girl, you still will be worrying about LOSING her from the get-go.

The answer? Start with the jalopies of the world.

Too old. Too young. Too ugly. Too… blonde, whatever. Don’t try to talk to the girls that make you stutter and stammer, talk to women where you’ve got nothing to lose, women you’re not even ATTRACTEDto.

Talk to at least three a day for a week.

After those 21 women, you should feel a LOT more comfortable approaching and talking to women. Once that happens, you can start talking to women you would actually like to date. And once you’re comfortable with that, you can talk to women you find crazy hot. And then… you’re not a shy guy anymore.

Question from a Reader

What I find hard to do is to keep eye contact with a girl I don’t know while feeling comfortable. How did you become comfortable doing this?

I have been told by many girls that I have very nice eyes. Many times I accidentally catch a woman’s eyes when she’s walking past, but they usually don’t seem to smile, but just have an expressionless face and then look away. From your past experience, can you figure out what is going on here?

Derek’s Response

For keeping eye contact, try not to think about anything. Just picture all your thoughts vanishing from your mind in a big explosion, poof, and the head’s empty. You should be able to hold eye contact a looooong time this way, if necessary.

As far as the smiling, the question is, are YOU smiling? Because in my experience, you tend to get an equal and opposite response to whatever signal you yourself are sending.

Smile, and she’ll smile back. If you look at her with a blank face, she’ll do the same. You’re cuing her – whether you know it or not, so cue her right. Get that smile. By giving one.

Derek Vitalio

Check out Derek Vitalio material:

04.15.08

Approaching A Woman

Posted in Speed Seduction tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , at 12:43 pm by seduction teacher

Question from a Reader:

One of the biggest problems I’ve had about approaching is NOT being able to follow up my approach, should I get a good or bad response. Let me give you two examples that happened recently:

1. I was in a bar and approached a group of girls all sitting down having a great time. I said “Hello” to the girl nearest “do you mind if I join you ladies?” with a smile and looked also at the other girls. The girl I spoke to looked at me then, went silent and looked at the girl in front of her with a bashful smile while all the other girls looked at me. One of her friends said “She wasn’t in a talkative mood.” – now I get the impression that these girls were not ‘expecting’ to be approached but also I think I didn’t ‘follow up” properly from the opener to stop that SILENT MOMENT. Now this awkward silent moment puts me out of state so the words don’t come out.

2. I saw a girl walking in the street and, noticing her boots (which were brown), I mentioned “Excuse me, I was looking to buy a present similar to your boots… do you know any shops around here that may sell them?” She mentioned that they weren’t bought locally, but also recommended a few shops. I asked her if she visits these shops often… BUT then the conversation seemed to go pretty mundane and platonic.

Just to let you know, I’m actively applying what I’m learning in Seduction Science, your feedback and some ideas of my own into a personal plan bit by bit.

Derek’s Response:

Ok, the problem in your first scenario was NOT your follow up – it was your LEAD IN.

Your opener in this case is not good – in fact, it says a lot of the wrong things.

First, you’re asking permission. In other words, you’re handing power over to the women, allowing THEM to create your reality for you. NO NO NO! NEVER do that – if you’re going to join, then join with an interesting hook that gets them curious about you. Don’t ask permission – that’s like those people who can never ask a question without starting “Can I ask you a question?”

You just did buddy. Annoying.

Likewise, once you address the group, you’ve joined. Your job is to be playful and interesting enough that they don’t want to throw you out, but instead they want to keep you in the group.

Another thing: judging by your story, it sounds like you interrupted them in the middle of a vibe. While that is occasionally unavoidable, in general EVERY group has silences, dead time, transitional moments… THESE are the times when it’s best to strike.

Enter a vibing group and jar them from their roll, you’ve done something detrimental and you’re going to have to work a lot harder to get accepted.

Enter a resting or bored group and inject some interest, you’ve done something beneficial and you’ll have a LOT more leeway to work with.

Now the second story, you start off strong – with bonus points because you picked out an article that she probably holds in high value (not bought locally = more rare and special).

The problem is you went too long, and you got too mundane. Women are NOT going to be turned on by small talk, and they’re NOT going to want to stand in the middle of the street having a conversation with a stranger too long.

So instead, after you’ve got her talking to you, solicit an opinion. In your case, you could ask her what ELSE would make a good present – since by her boots obviously she has tastes in line.

If you’re in the right area, you could actually ask her to take you to some of the shops she mentions – women love to shop with a guy that wants to be there.

Alternatively, you could say “You know, I find you really interesting, but standing in the middle of the street like this is a bit awkward. Let’s go get some coffee.”

If she’s free, she’ll probably agree. If not, you can get her information and a rain check. Either way you’re continuing up the chain and turning the dial a bit more, step by step getting closer to your goal.

As opposed to regressing into small talk, and depressing your chances. In fact, small talk is SO bad that, no matter how long you’ve talked and no matter what you’re doing next, if you can’t think of anything to say but small talk then instead say “Listen, I have to go, but I’ve enjoyed chatting. Why don’t you give me your email (or phone number) and we’ll get coffee sometime.” Then get out.

Small talk will KILL you. Whereas appearing busy and confident will help. You know what to do next time my man.

Question from a Reader:

Derek, when I’m at work and a cute girl walks in or comes in through the drive thru (I work at a McDonald’s by the way) what’s the best way to pick up on them without looking like I’m hitting on them. Constantly I see these gorgeous women come in or drive through and I’m last as to how I could attract them without looking desperate or like an idiot. Thanks.

Derek’s Response:

Ok, you’ve got three main problems to deal with.

1. Women don’t tend to think about the guy at McDonald’s as lover-man material. While jobs don’t matter nearly as much as we guys think they do, it DOES matter a good bit when you’re trying to pick someone up AT WORK. That’s because, instead of your job being a part of you, it is your known identity. And McDonald’s cashier is not the sort of glamour position you want in that case.

2. Management isn’t going to like it. This sort of thing gets people fired all the time, especially at high turnover jobs.

3. The pace at McDonald’s is FAST, and any extra conversation is going to slow that down. A lot of people are there specifically because they don’t have much time; slowing them down with talk might just be annoying to them, and again, get you in trouble with management.

So what’re you to do?

Personally, I’d just write these women off, or at most use them as practice with your techniques, but not as actual targets. Especially if you value your job.

However, if you insist on going for it, start with a simple super-friendly warm greeting. If you get anything but equal warmth back, write that girl off – she’s in a hurry or pissed or for whatever reason not available now.

If you get a good response, continue with noticing something about her. Make this go FAST – notice something, talk to her about it, and get the info in about 15 seconds. If it takes more than that, sorry buddy, your job is going to get in the way.

So, for example “You have such a great energy. Do you do yoga or something?”

Her: “No, but I work out.”

You: “Maybe that’s it. You know, I really enjoy your energy. Let’s get together after I’ve washed the stink of fry out of my hair. Give me your number.”

While she’s writing it down on a napkin (keep a stack and some pens nearby) you can even help the next customer. If she’s digging you at this point, you can work in a few more techniques while serving others – basically, giving her the intelligent part of your brain while your body performs rote skills. This is good for a minute or two – it gives her a chance to see you as something other than a McDonald’s worker – but don’t go on too long. Excuse yourself, get back to work, and if she’s eating in the restaurant, DON’T constantly glance her way. Once to say goodbye is plenty.
Derek Vitalio

Check out Derek Vitalio material:

03.23.08

Not Just About Hot Women

Posted in Speed Seduction tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , at 4:16 pm by seduction teacher

One of the really amazing things about helping guys change when it comes to attracting and enjoying wonderful women is, that their entire lives seem to also improve.

There is a reason for this.

You see, when your beliefs about what is possible in a difficult area of life are strongly challenged; when suddenly you start to win(and win BIG) in an area of life that used to be confusing, frustrating, even painful then, my friend…

All Sorts Of Positive Possibilities Begin To Open

Along those lines, I got the most beautiful email the other day (and I encourage you to email me with your success stories: sandworm77@ca.rr.com will reach best reach me).
Here it is,word for word:

“Dear Ross,

I know you get a lot of mail so I’ll keep this brief as I can. With your material, I found a woman I thought was the one. It turned out that was not the case, so I broke up with her.

However, thanks to your material, I have also recovered faster than I ever have before from a breakup in my life. I’ve listened to side 9 of the BHSC
(http://www.seductiontuition.com/speed-seduction
)

several times recently, specifically when you relate the story of the monkey and the truly great saying “What you refuse to let go of is the thing that keeps you stuck.”

When I first started learning about SS, I simply expected to learn how to get women. I did that.

But more than that, I have learned how to live a better life, how to be happier with myself, and how to accept the things that happen, learn from them and move on. You are a great person. Your willingness to improve the lives of others is a special quality, and I just wanted to say thank you.

I hope that I can get to a seminar sometime, just so I can shake your hand and thank you in person.

Again, thank you!
Tim Stoltzfus,
Dallas, Texas”

Wow. Thanks, Tim. Things in life don’t always work out as we hoped for or planned; the important thing is to quickly bounce back and go for something even better than what you used to want.

And, for all the guys out there, I want to say this material does work-and it works EVEN BETTER the more you apply it to EVERY area of life.

I’m proud to be teaching guys like you, and I look forward to teaching many more. It’s what gets me up in the morning and keeps me going to the wee hours of the night(well, that and my vision of the UCLA Women’s Volleyball team thinking up new ways to put a smile on my face!)

Piece and peace,

Ross Jeffries

P.S. If you want some incredible ways to get your ladies steaming hot within 10 minutes of meeting them, including three seemingly “innocent” places to touch her that will have her jumping out of her clothes, you simply must check out my Advanced Irresistible Arousal DVD; one of my newest and best selling, secret-packed products. Jump right over here:
http://www.seductiontuition.com/speed-seduction

P.P.S. What’s that you are saying? You STILL don’t own a Speed Seduction® Home Study Course? THE “flagship” Ross Jeffries product to teach you the deep secrets to easily attracting and seducing the women you want, without stupid dating tips, trite pick up lines, and the rest of the crap that reduces men to beggars? Well, you can enjoy success like Tim S and thousands of
others by going right here: http://www.seductiontuition.com/speed-seduction

03.08.08

My Greatest Teacher Revealed

Posted in Speed Seduction tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , at 11:32 am by seduction teacher

One Day is a very special day for me.

It’s the 84th birthday of perhaps the greatest teacher I have ever known.

The one person who influenced my mind and taught me things about learning that truly enabled me to have the persistence and the ways of thinking that let me make the breakthroughs I’ve discovered at taught you all.

Now, in my life, I’ve had the opportunity and good luck to have many great teachers.

Among them, Richard Bandler, the founder, creator and father of NLP.

My yoga teacher, Mark Whitwell.

Gary Halbert, the single most important influence on my style as a copywriter.

Most recently, Matt Furey, who is an amazing marketer and a true fitness “guru”.

But far and away, the one person who taught me most about learning, and learning to teach myself, is celebrating her 84th birthday today.

That person is, Sylvia, my most beloved and brilliant mother.

Yes, even seduction gurus love their mothers.(Or at least I HOPE the other seduction “gurus” love theirs, but who knows?)

But in my Mom’s case, she taught me amazing lessons about learning.

First of all, she taught me that I could learn to learn anything.

As a kid, if I had a question about something, her answer was always, “Why don’t you look it up?” Then she would dramatically gesture to the set of Encyclopedias that filled an entire shelf of the wall to wall bookcase that was in my parents’ bedroom.

The second thing she taught me, by example, was to simply and honestly say “I don’t know” when she didn’t know the answer to something.

Rather than fake like she knew, she made it ok by example to say, “I don’t know. Why don’t YOU find out?”

These are powerful permissions to give a child, indeed to give anyone, and I hope you apply that lesson to what you do with your own mind.

The third thing she taught me was, “There is always an answer somewhere. If you don’t know it yet, find someone who does. If they don’t know, then YOU go find the answer. But don’t quit
looking and don’t give up. You are smart enough to learn and to figure out anything.”

Now, the beauty is, she didn’t always teach this directly. She’d do it by example(as I do with you guys, as a teacher) or by telling stories(as I do with you guys) and using metaphors(as I
do with you guys).

Yep. After 18 years of studying NLP, mythology, magic, etc., my basic teaching(and learning) skills…

Comes Down To What I Learned From Mom!

Finally, I will tell you that one of the coolest things she ever said, that I think, even back as a 7 year old boy, set a course for me was this:

One day, I was back-talking her and sassing her like crazy.(Can you believe that, contrary to my sweet, agreeable, ADULT personality, that as a kid, I was a sarcastic, nasty little sh*t?).

Mom just shook her finger at me and said, “Kid, if you don’t knock it off, one day you will grow up to be an iconoclast”.

I looked at her, and as I’m sure she guessed I would, said, “What’s that?”

She smiled as if peering into a future that would one day catch up to me and said, “That’s someone who goes around kicking down other people’s sacred idols!”

“Wow, ” I thought to myself. “That’s totally what I want to be”.

And 40 years later, here I am!

If you’ve ever learned anything of value to me, then please join me as I say,

HAPPY F’***NG BIRTHDAY, MOM!

Piece and peace,

Ross Jeffries

P.S. Just so you know, my Mom AND Dad(indeed my whole family) knows what I do for a living and heartily approves. In fact, my 17 year old nephew, Gideon,and his 15 year old brother, Gabe, are BOTH studying their Speed Seduction® Home Courses(with their Mom’s permission of course!).

You can get your fabulous Speed Seduction® Home Study Course and catch up with these ambitious young p*mps by just clicking right here:

P.P.S. If you want to radiate amazing confidence that attract women before you even talk to them, check out my Fear To Charisma video: http://www.seductiontuition.com/speed-seduction

02.21.08

I Told You So

Posted in Speed Seduction tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , at 1:18 pm by seduction teacher

I’ve been told by some of the people who know me best that, at times, I can actually have something of an “obnoxious” personality.

Can you believe that anyone would think that of your dear, sweet, modest, unassuming Guru?

Oh well…..people’s lack of understanding and insight truly abounds!

Anyway, one of my allegedly more obnoxious traits is to crow about it and get all puffed up when someone who doubted me comes to see that I am right!

Now, I have to say, that when students are first exposed to my material, often times….

..They Are Filled With Doubt!

I don’t take offense to this, really. What I am teaching really is radically different from the trite dating tips, “pick up lines”, seduction advice and “men as bullies or beggars” scenarios that are offered up on this Information Super-Highway we are enjoying. So you ought to be at least a little skeptical when something truly different comes along.

Most radically different is I teach that things like “vibe” and “energy” and “mind to mind connection” are not just sloppy New Age, airy-fairy fantasies, but that they actually are powerful, practical tools that work! Tools that can take a guy who has been stuck in his left-brained, internal-dialogue way of thinking and help him produce radical change.

Now, one thing I teach a lot about is the power of breath and guided intent to make you much more attractive to women and it pleases me like crazy to hear from guys that I am right.

To that end, here’s an interesting story from a student that I think you will particularly enjoy, especially about one VERY unusual result that even I never expected!
Dear Ross,

I too have the Fear into Charisma Video(http://www.seductiontuition.com/speed-seduction
)
along with 70%of your stuff-lol)

I’ve done so many of the exercises(fire breath, inner circle, bouncing ball, etc) I don’t know which one is responsible for the attention anymore.

The result is that I have a highly charged state all the time — A girl who wasn’t that into me showed up unexpectedly after a rehearsal late Monday night, and she got me to spend some time with her.

Another nice side effect is that my senses are now heightened, meaning that I can sense when a woman is checking me out. I had no idea I was that attractive until I felt that…”cord of light, going from me to three other girls.”–lol! Seriously though, girls are approaching me despite of myself.

I can also now sense if a girl is “ready” — (it happened twice so far, and still freaks me out)there’s an energetic surge between the solar plexus and the groin area in my case.

In both instances,the women were very excited(and leaking s*xual energy) when they were talking to me.

I find the Magickal Self ritual to be very powerful. The inner circle version along with the fire breathing has yielded incredible results. People in my circle now view me with certain awe and respect(my sister-in-law has a crush on me-lol!). I have never been happier in my life.

Inigo Sibayan
London, England”

Inigo,

Wow. I knew the Fear To Charisma stuff worked to get girls, but to get your sister-in-law to have a crush on you? Given my sisters-in-law I’m not sure I would even want that!

Now, if guys can get their mothers-in-law to have a crush on them, I’d make a friggin’ fortune.

In any case, congrats on having the guts to try on some things that are totally new and different, but as I am fond of saying….

I told you so!

Anyway, good luck and keep going with the awesome success!

Peace and piece,

Ross Jeffries

P.S. Don’t you want to have women hot and noticing you before you even open your mouth? Just go here to get started, now: http://www.seductiontuition.com/speed-seduction

P.P.S. If you want to know the 4 working ways to approach women, anytime, anywhere and never worry about what to say, check out the Gold Walk Up DVD:
http://www.seductiontuition.com/speed-seduction

P.P.P.S Is it really true that some of you still don’t have the Speed Seduction® Home Study Course? The flagship product that has what you need to sweet talk your way into any woman’s heart AND naughty regions without canned pick-up lines, trite “dating tips” and all that stupid stuff that forces men to be “bully or beggar”. Just go here:
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